Birthday Buys

Well, here I am. I've reached my ideal age and I've decided that I am going to remain this age forever. 26 is old enough to sound like an adult, while still young enough to sound like a spring chicken.

I also decided that I'm old enough now to not feel insecure about my age. I feel like people scoff at 20-25 but 26 is considered mature. So, I decided to treat myself to a couple of completely age inappropriate birthday presents to celebrate reaching maturity. I figure if my face still looks like an eighteen year old's what's the point in trying to fight it. I might as well just look like a damn child from top to bottom and relish in it while I still can. Behold: