What? My Butt?

I think that day has finally come where my desk job has ruined my butt. John Tesh always warns that sitting at a desk day in and day out will flatten your backside. Well, I think after five years the inevitable has happened. I caught a glimpse of my behind today and it was shocking. Its like I hit 25 and my cheeks dropped four inches. What the hell happened back there? How do I prevent this from getting worse? I think should start doing pilates. Look what it did for Madonna! Well, maybe that's a bad example...

How horrible is it that our faces and our butts are the things we're most insecure about on our bodies, and both are impossible to see with our naked eyes. It takes a mirror and some twisting to see each respectively.